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Being in the Moment Vs. Snapchatting it

October 26, 2016

You spent the whole time snapchatting the concert. I’m not even sure you enjoyed the music.”

These were the exact words spoken by my sister to me as we left the Hollywood Bowl after a performance by Kygo, a D.J. from Norway.

I love Snapchat. Its focus on fleeting content is refreshingly different from social media platforms like Facebook and Instagram, where content is permanent unless deleted. Yet, despite its novelty, I found myself discovering a serious drawback of the app while I was at the concert.

I was so focused on capturing the perfect picture that I had forgotten the mere essence of why I even bought a ticket — to enjoy the music. I had taken more than 21 videos. That translated to a lot of time spent on my phone screen when I really should have been watching the performance.

This is not to undermine Snapchat’s value as a social media platform. Unlike Instagram, which is more often than not a collection of one’s best moments, Snapchat provides a more realistic picture of daily life. I’ve sent snaps of myself stressing over exams, impending work, or even when I was having a bad hair day. I wouldn’t do the same on Facebook or Instagram. Furthermore, Snapchat allows for a deeper connection between you and those that you send ‘snaps’ too. Unlike text messages, it is predominantly picture-based, thus bringing in a visual element which is sometimes more personal than plain text.

Perhaps my real problem with Snapchat is what it’s become. I find myself attending social events for the sole purpose of posting it on snapchat — so people know I’m having fun. It’s developed into a vehicle for peer pressure and has led to a fear of missing out, or “FOMO.”

Social media is a powerful tool within limits. Sometimes, you’re better off being in the moment than capturing it on your device. Pictures or videos are not the only source of proof that you’ve attended an event.

Memories exist, too.

Prof. Jeffrey Flory, “Do Competitive Workplaces Deter Female Workers?”

October 26, 2016

As a Robert Day School Professor, Jeffrey Flory specializes in development economics and has received grants from the World Bank and the Lowe Institute of Political Economy.

This week, I had the honor of attending his Athenaeum talk on the effect of competitive workplaces on female employees.

It is common understanding that there are prominent gender differences in our labor market. In the US, women’s wages are approximately 20% lower than men’s; women only account for 2.5% of the 5 highest paid executives in large firms; and, compared to their male counterparts, are more likely to be unemployed. Various explanations have been offered as to why these disparities still exist: differences in human capital skills, the effect of traditional family roles, and stereotype threats against women.

Prof. Flory’s research expands on a novel approach to explain the gender gap in the workplace: competition. Laboratory experiments have found that work performance of men is substantially more responsive to competition incentives than that of women. This, in turn, may prevent female workers from performing their best when they know they are competing with other employees for promotions or raises. Further lab experiments show a gender difference in preferences for performing in competitive settings. On average, men have a taste for competition, while women tend to exhibit a distaste for it. This results in men embracing competition and women shying away from it.

It is essential that we become aware of the implications of these findings. For the social realm, these conclusions indicate that if women have an aversion to competition, they are less likely to seek promotions and raises, perhaps even removing themselves from the picture. Moreover, if women dislike performing under competitive circumstances, they are more likely to shy away from fields that are perceived as highly competitive. Findings also indicate that highly competent women select out of competitive workplaces while incompetent men select into them. The economic implications of these observations are of great importance. This poor allocation of employee capacity affects firms’ productivity and efficiency, indicating that perhaps firms are not attracting the best possible talent, thus failing to maximize economic performance and prosperity.

Prof. Flory aims to develop this field of study, taking research outside of the lab into natural economic environments. His real labor market experiment involved 9,000 job-seekers interested in a real employment position. By manipulating compensation treatments, he found that having a team-based work environment as well as lowering the amount of wage that is based on competition can help eliminate the gender gap.

This research can provide invaluable insight into a prominent issue in our society. I am looking forward to seeing how this field advances, and observing its positive impact on our changing workplace.

Marriage as a Relationship

October 24, 2016

As one of the few married students on campus, a lot of my friends ask me what marriage is like. My generic, and honest, response is usually this: it’s like living with your best friend: 90% of the time it’s super cool, and 10% of the time it’s either trying not to kill them because they did something that made you unreasonably mad or just needing a second to yourself. After a year of explaining it this way, I’ve given it a bit more thought and the result is the following proposition: marriage is first and foremost just a relationship.

I know what you’re thinking… of course marriage is a relationship. And yes, I know. But what I mean is that the mechanisms of maintaining a marriage are the same as maintaining a friendship with a family member or loved one.

It takes effort, it’s not always fun, there will be disagreements, and there will be bad days.

It takes compromise, trust, communication, and a mutual desire to maintain the relationship.

It is the most beautiful part of your life, and the most painful.

Relationships are multifaceted, tenuous structures predicated on history, emotions, and external factors like distance, stressors on individuals, and circumstance. Most simply put, they are the result of two individuals’ consistent decisions to make room and time for each other. And if you love each other, the effort it worth it.

The point is this: romantic relationships take on dimensions and depth that most relationships don’t. The nuances of having a significant other come from trying to maintain different types of relationships with one person. They are your friend, your family, your lover, your team mate, and everything in between. That’s a lot of dynamics and trying to balance them all makes the relationship more dynamic than others. So much so that it’s easy to forget that marriage (and other forms of dating) is in the simplest explanation just a relationship. And remembering that makes it a lot easier to manage, refine, and sustain.